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Tuesday, March 16, 2010

On Tiger, Elin, Granny and a pint of Courvasier...

Look, it is no secret that I am a drinker.
To those that know and have been around the family, there is no secret that the fact that I drink comes largely from being from a family that drinks.
This blog, and likely few others to come, will be about that in general.
But last night I got a call from Granny...
[Phlip note - in fact, put a pin in that one and we'll come back to it]

It has been said that Tiger and Elin are buddy buddy again, now that he is out of damage control sex rehab, and thinking about returning to golf, and now they're being seen out in the world together again...
The questions are out over what kind of sucker she is for accepting him back after his alleged transgressions of 12+ jumpoffs and just how earnest she is about making this thing work, or if she is in it for the paycheck.
As I have previously opined (two links, that), I have been convinced all along that she was in it because the (by way of marriage) partner's share of anything is usually half, if only by way of inclusion. She could leave, but one would be a fool to believe that Tiger's handlers and lawyers would allow him to marry a model/his homie's nanny without a MOUNTAIN of protection for his assets. Not with tales that they were allegedly urging him to "wife someone up," as they may say in these skreets, to uphold his wholesome image in his chosen profession despite his apparently already-known philanderous ways.

Ask Tiger, I am willing to bet that HE will tell you he ain't going anywhere, with a reason relatable to "sheeit, I paid for all this shit!" and ask Elin, and SHE will tell you that SHE isn't going anywhere with a similar "hell, HE paid for all this shit," and they both will be right.
The thing is, though, that the more things change no matter how high the stakes, the more they stay the same.

And this is where the alcohol and my old Granny come into the tale here.
Again, I come by my habits honestly. I enjoy a good laugh because I am a clown, and I enjoy a good roll in the bed because I am human. I enjoy a good meal because I'm fat. I enjoy a good drink by way of heredity, so to speak; when raised around drinkers, you run the chance of becoming one.
Last night, about 8pm, I got a phonecall from Granny and it was about nothing in particular after discussion of a wreck that had taken place 2 blocks from my house. Given the amount of time between the cleanup of the accident that'd left her sitting in traffic for a while and the call, the safest inference would be that she was on the way to the liquor store situated 4 blocks from my house, and had imbibed in a taste, and now wanted someone to talk to.
Generally, I know not to answer the phone from certain people at a certain time of day, and after 8 is that time for granny, as she is a talkative drinker about anything and nothing at the same time.
The conversation went on for over an hour, going from Obama, to family, to Clinton, back to family and then on to sanctity of relationships, which is the tie-in to this post in particular.
Never was Tiger Woods mentioned in our conversation, but somehow it was mentioned that back in the 40s and 50s -- perhaps on through the 60s and beyond, I only started keeping score in the 80s and 90s -- that it was less of a huge deal that men would "tip out," as she so succinctly put it, maintaining "girlfriends" (that's plural, folks) so long as they came home with the money and properly took care of home. By "taking care" of home, I mean those things that men are expected to do, as in providing food, shelter and clothing for his family. Without revealing too much, I will allow you that my grandparents and their kids all had that food shelter and clothing as per installed norms of the time and I do not fuck with my pops, period.

In so many words, this makes Elin Nordegren more "old fashioned" in her approach to her marriage than any so-called "independent" woman that would have done all within her abilities to take him to the cleaners for what he did.
I am not to say what is right or wrong, and one can feel free to drop a line on my woman and ask me if my house is being taken care of. It is also understandable that there are two sides to this as well. I mean that as there are situations where it is fair either way for the man to provide the majority of the housing and wellbeing of all within those walls, while it is just as fair for them to split things 50/50. As it were, when playing in the rarefied air that a billionaire plays in and I do not, we can understand that I might care for a little help around the house.

The question was asked (specifically by Barri over at Witches Brew, which is why this post even exists) whether a dude who sticks with a chick who sticks with him after cheating as many times as Tiger has alleged to have cheated does he lose respect for her while doing so.
My initial answer was shortish and to the point:
"If a woman forgives a man for cheating once, maybe a couple of times if it is a rocky relationship and they get it together on the strength of the kids, then yes some respect can be salvaged.
However
If a dude cheats THAT many times and/or has a ton of money, it is telltale that he has options and is simply going through the motions. A 10-figure earner has the options to make anther forgive and forget a lot more easily, even if they did not want to. For that, I can't imagine he has a ton of respect for her or will ever be fully "rehabbed," as if he ever intended to be."

And now I can expand on that since I am in a post of my own.
My first part of my answer remains just as stated. I am not the one to salvage broken relationships, I have become a "touch and go" type of person in my old age, but I can understand people who will when there are bigger things on the line, like kids or such.
The second part's message remains, but bears explanation...
There comes a time when the stakes become unfathomably HUGE, like when one person in the situation happens to be a billionaire. The stakes are much much higher, both parties stand to lose a lot. You have a dude with all the options that his weight can afford him, and has apparently shown himself willing to indulge. On the other side of that, you have what is currently a wife who I happen to believe was once one of those indulgences. The questions to ask, among some that I am not quite super smart enough to fashion on my own, include...
  1. Who is to say that he EVER respected her beyond what we see as a simple business transaction?
  2. Who is to say that she hasn't been okay with that, conceding that as long as his billions are doing right by home and the kids, that all is fine?
  3. Who are any of us to cast stones at the dude when we can't possibly know what goes on?
I am not saying that I have the wherewithal -- morally or financially -- to go through with maintaining ONE jumpoff relationship, let alone 12 or more. I don't like to share and I respect the golden rule, so I keep mine to myself just the same.
What I am saying is that he change of stakes as it relates to a dude living check to check to pay his mortgage -- or even one who lived in a less expensive period in time while such behaviors were acceptable -- is a lot different from one who can afford to wipe his ass with thousand dollar bills when he sits down to pee. That man never really needed to respect his wife, and can afford to tell you to go have sex with yourself for suggesting that he should.

1 comment:

Om1kron said...

I personally think celebrities just get married for publicity, you can hit it and go get it with anyone you want in Hollywood. Or in the world for that matter, why start a family when there is so much real estate out there for you.

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