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Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Phlip's 2010 NFL Post

While I like Football more than we've all read that I do baseball, I am absolutely not the standard rabid meathead fan that seems to rear their ugly heads this time of year. That being said, if you're for looking for something as in-depth and knowledgeable as my Basketball Posts, you should probably leave now.
Something about a sport where this guy has a chance seems a bit less than wholly enjoyable to me.


"BEEFCAAAAAAAKE!!!!"

I understand that any sport that employs up to 10 or more of what could be construed as "fat dudes" on the field at any given time makes the average American feel as if he is witnessing something that he might have a realistic chance at doing, further endearing himself to it, but I just ain't feeling it like that.

Don't get me wrong, now, I like Football just fine. I just prefer to watch a sport with less stop-and-go to it, so give me basketball any day.

That being said, don't look for me to have spent time understanding offensive/defensive schemes, don't look for me to assess talent beyond what I see on highlight shows, even if I was watching the game when it happened and don't look for any meaningful predictions out of me.

Since a child, I have been a San Francisco 49ers fan...
Why?
Well, at the age I started getting into sports, they had the players I liked. Joe Montana and Jerry Rice linked up for obscene amounts of yards and touchdowns, Ronnie Lott kept the defense entertaining... There was enough action on the field for my short attention span to be entertained. A loyal fan doesn't jump teams, even when one sprouts up 90 miles from my home when I am on the way to the 11th grade one year removed from my team of choice winning their last most recent Superbowl.
That being said, and since Steve Young seeing his career cut short by concussions and Terrell Owens leaving the team in his wake, I am not all the way faithful that we will make much noise this season. Good thing I won't be left to see many of the games on television.

The Detroit Lions will be vying for the league toilet again.
[Phlip note - that is a self-writing prediction year in and year out]

  • Fuck Brett Favre, I've grown tired of his Soap Opera every year here.

  • Fuck Peyton Manning, I have grown tired of him choking on the biggest stage more than succeeding on it.
    This year, with the rule changes in place, he won't make it that far though.

  • Fuck Ben RoofieRoethlisberger, if he had been black he would not be playing at all this season... As it were, he will surely see his suspension shortened.
[Phlip note - and you can suck my "race card" ass if you think otherwise]

  • Fuck Roger Goodell... No further explanation needed.

  • Fuck Terrell Owens, except this time he will escape the stigma of ruining a team, as this time he joined one that seems to revel in not getting along worth a shit already.

  • Fuck fantasy football.

I could go on and on with this all day, but the fact remains that I do not feel like it.

Who will win the Superbowl this year?
Beats me! Hell, I couldn't even predict -- based upon what I think I know right now -- who will be in the playoffs. Yes, the amount of a fuck that I give is literally that small. I am more about simply watching the playoffs, as they provide way better parity than the regular season.

What I do know is that I am most appreciative of Football for its nearly completely removing the focus from Baseball for the last weeks of the season.
Besides, Football is a little bit ghey anyway...
It also provides a workable something-to-do for me while I wait impatiently for the NBA season to commence at the end of October.


Required reading:
5 Reasons Why The NBA is Better Than The NFL - VSB.



Wake me up when the playoffs start, I will try to care a little more then.
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