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Showing posts with the label competition

True Story©… Radio Violence

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       My brain is like a training exercise in just how much infinitely useless bullshit can fit into a tiny, tiny space.   I say that to say that I know a LOT about a LOT of things that do nothing in the interest in paying my bills. [ Phlip note : Speaking of bills…   Website renewal fees are next week Wednesday.   Anyone wanna pitch in?   The best nation is donation.   Please and thank you ! ]      Anyway…   I know a lot about a lot but one thing I cannot seem to avoid is unsolicited phone calls and, not those of the “extended car warranty” sort. As ever, this week’s tale begins with a phone call.   This time it was from an international number…   This should be fun. Me: “New phone, who dis?” Caller: “Good afternoon, sir.   Long time no hear from.” Me: “D-do I know you?” Caller: “You ask this every time you speak with one of us.” Me: “’one of us’ as in who the fuck?” Caller: “Well, sir…   I am the director of the International Supervillain’s Convention, and--…” Me

True Story© Supervillain vs. Supervillain

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I am a supervillain. A bearded, hefty, mean-ass supervillain whose short-term memory is terrible, but remembers EXCRUCIATING details of mundane shit that happened forever ago just to hold a grudge.  Shit, that is how I BECAME a supervillain.      After my accident in 2003 is when I basically decided to fully embrace my bearded supervillainy and I am to understand that this about when I grew to full inner/interstellar notoriety for my escapades. One day a couple of years in, I got a letter. “ Mr. Phillips, this contact is to offer our deepest appreciation for your contributions to the profession of being a supervillain.  We know the amount of stress and deep thought that goes into the making even the most mundane of plans, and as a token of our appreciation we would LOVE to have you at the Annual International Supervillain vs. Supervillain convention and competition.  We will send a courier with the official invite and registration form, containing all necessary cont