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True Story©… The Book That Never Ends

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  (not to be confused with the SONG that never ends...)      Funny thing, this whole living a life chronicled in True Story©… [ Phlip note : there’s the thing, already! ] You’re told in school to take notes knowing that the information covered and ostensibly noted will come up when it is time for a knowledge check.   Similarly, typing out the exploits here to be followed by interested onlookers allows anyone reading to look back and realize that this comes off as not a collection of stories, but an infinitely expanding connected singular one.      Chronicling the exploits in detail also lays immediately bare the “dammit, this again” feeling when some shit I dealt with before decides to fall back into my life. Something I should have learned about supervillainy watching superhero cartoons for the last 89% of my life is that villainy, as karma is concerned, is NEVER ending.   You can do dirt, but that also means you will have a rough go of getting away from said dirt.      I can

True Story© Midget Spinners™

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       Y’all remember Pogo Balls? What about now ? For those of you who smoke too much of the Devil’s lettuce to remember or too damn lazy to click a link and be reminded, they were a toy of the 80’s where a sturdy-ass rubbery ball was stuffed securely into a disc, which would serve as a board to stand upon and jump around on like a pogo stick.  As one might imagine, many hilarious injuries would ensue. As the significant other of a public school teacher, I am well aware of the phenomenon of Fidget Spinners and while I have not played with them as a toy, I have sold a few of them for profit and know what a fucking annoyance they are to teachers and the like.  I also wish I could have been the one to come up with the concept of them as a TOY and not what they were in their initially-intended iteration. Jealousy will breed either hate or action, and I don’t have the energy to hate.      Enter: Midget Spinners™! That’s right, Midget Spinners™! I went on Amazon and

True Story© A Huge Little Ordeal

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                For the first couple of weeks after I got home from Guantanamo , I was kinda messed up.  Basically just didn’t know how to approach the world and always on edge.  They say that one experiences things similar to PTSD when they have been subjected to torture conditions and yes waterboarding IS torture. With these things front of mind, it was understood that I was often angry about my situation or moreso just that I HAD to be placed into that one.  With no real outlet but luckily still gainfully employed, I took on the task of messing with other people’s lives for my own entertainment.                 I’d read lurid stories about how, during the taping of The Wizard of Oz in 1939, the people who played the munchkins were basically a weird drunken mob of 120+ little people during their off-camera time.  The reason for this is that this was the first time that many – well, most – of them had ever been around OTHER little people.  Some were foreign and many already in